The Rogueies: Guilty Pleasure Game

Not all games are high ahhhrt. Not all games are widely appealing. But some games are just comfort food that we keep going back to. You don't have to hate yourself for playing these games, but it helps if you hate yourself a little every time you load it up.

Clover Pit

Balatro gets a pass on its endless, RNG-dependent replayability because it basically defined a new genre — typically mundane games where you get to break all the rules with modifiers. In this new year of Balatro-likes, those passes are harder to come by.

Clover Pit is one of the best Balatro-likes and it does get a (qualified) pass. But it’s still just an overly complicated slot machine simulator. It’s just so good.

— JP

Farmer was Replaced

There’s an argument to be made here that Farmer was Replaced is not a guilty pleasure because you learn programming while you play. And that’s fair. But, at the same time, agonizing for an hour to perfect a WHILE loop that makes a video game drone change the hat it’s wearing isn’t exactly thrilling gameplay. Don’t get me wrong, it’s rewarding gameplay, but it’s not really something I’m proud of.

— JP

Megabonk

When thinking about what games we’d be mildly embarrassed to show our partners (even though my wife is a straight up gamer, and is weird, so not much shocks her), my mind immediately went to Megabonk.

Look, this game is really fun, but I am a 31 year old man who is too online (begrudgingly) for someone in their 30s. We’re not supposed to be online anymore! It’s not OK! Our old brains can’t handle it!

Anyway, the internet is bad and Megabonk is essentially 3D Vampire Survivors (good!) but filled with internet humor (icepick to the eye).

I realize this is the oldest anyone has ever sounded before, but I did not find the “can I has upgrade”-type shit amusing after my 20th run. I know. I’m “the man (derogatory, like how they use it in School of Rock, a movie that makes me also feel old now because Jack Black is so young in it, but also all the parents were totally right to be furious at the end of that movie and I, as a parent myself, empathize with them. How does Principle Mullins not lose her job?! DEWEY SHOULD BE IN JAIL! Anyway)” now, and I’ve come to accept that. But Jesus, dude. Jesus Christ, this video game.

It absolutely wins the award for “2025’s most fun game that also gives me a headache after like 45 minutes because it’s basically just a walking, talking subreddit."

— RG

Troleu

Troleau is an old school action game based around achieving goals and racking up the highest possible score. My task is to keep a trolley car under control, which sounds simple, but I cannot stress enough that my passengers are monsters that must be kept in line. They love playing music, getting into fist fights, and stinking the place up. The only thing public transit users love more than being terrible to be around is dodging their fare. 

Luckily, I’ve been empowered by the transit commission to beat these problematic passengers to unconsciousness and then throw them off the trolley. I will collect every dare and maintain a tight ship, and if I don’t, the ticket collector will check my work, and if I don’t meet his standards, he will chase me down the trolley car to beat me senseless. The only thing that can stop him is the bodies of kicked passengers, repurposed as projectiles. It’s deeply silly. I don’t care.

— CM

Guilty Pleasure winner — PowerWash Simulator 2

There’s an emerging (sub)genre of games that can be best described as something like “chore sims” or “dad sims.” They’re pretty brain-off games that just let you fall into the satisfaction of mindless tedium. No game exemplifies this better than PowerWash Simulator 2.

One of the first times I played PowerWash Simulator 2, my partner walked in. She watched for a minute and then announced, “You know the siding on our actual house that we live in needs to be actually powerwashed, right?” If that’s not the definition of a guilty pleasure game, I don’t know what is.

— JP